Christmas Fail Revisited

Some of you might recall our Christmas fail back in December. We decided we were going to do our best Clark Griswold impersonation and deck our house out in Christmas lights. You might recall that this did not go as planned. This was what we accomplished:

1. One skipping, cursing child. Who can forget Carter skipping up and down the porch yelling “goddamn, cheapass lights!” I can assure you we cannot forget . . . 2. Jason hanging precariously from a ladder that was an unwilling participant 3. One dark spot in the middle of our one small strip of icicle lights 4. One strand of icicle lights pointing up and giving us the finger 5. Two wannabe rednecks seriously considering leaving the lights on the porch roof year round so we never had to do this again.

Sadly, we came perilously close to accomplishing number five. We were so scarred by the experience of putting the lights up that we found a million reasons not to take them down. However as we had our marathon mulching session in the flowerbeds this week (we’re at 140 bags and counting now) I kept looking up at those stupid lights.

I said to myself “whose stupid idea was it to put those lights up anyway?” Then I answered myself, “oh, right, my stupid idea.”

As any good spouse does I started bothering Jason again about taking down the lights. It’s almost April and the Christmas lights are still up. Jason’s response? “No one can see our house from the road anyway. Who cares?” I told him I cared.

Jason immediately began listing off the bazillion things we have going on this week. I told him I didn’t care, that getting these stupid lights down was going to be thing number bazillion-and-one on the to-do list this week. He finally quite arguing with me and disappeared. He re-appeared driving one of the tractors. Just as when we put the lights up, we had another “don’t do this” moment while Jason stood in the bucket of the tractor and took the lights down. I should add that the Christmas lights came down the same day we mowed the lawn for the first time this year – serious fail on our part.

Maybe we’ll put them up again after Thanksgiving. Maybe not.

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B-Rad napping, Nemo, Taco and Sebastian grazing